Back in the Day #423 10/16/2018

What a field-day for the heat, a thousand people in the street. Singing songs and carrying signs mostly say, hooray for our side. – For What It’s Worth – 1966 – Buffalo Springfield

Welcome to Drivel Over Coffee. The Drivel rambles through this thing called life, stopping here and there for reflection, an enlightenment, some storytelling, and a touch of humor perhaps. Oh yes, an occasional rant. All the while my brain reverberates with the best music in the world – The ‘60’s and early 70’s. Yep – Lost in The Sixties. Remember, the brave kids who made this land free for you.

Holy cow, I went to bed, had a good night’s sleep, slept in a bit. Upon waking, it was winter. What happened to Fall? Good Grief, Mother Nature. What did we do to you. You give us endless days of heat, then endless days of rain, tickle us with a touch of fall and boom here we are in winter. I give up. I am beginning to study the hibernation techniques of the grizzly bears, so I can sleep through winter. I don’t like it and don’t want to deal with it at all. Okay, weather rant 101 is over. Oh, one last tidbit. Did you know that Grizzly bears are left handed or pawed?

I was reading some material last week from the 60’s. Boy, did those works bring back good memories. I have nothing but the fondest memories of my childhood and high school years. The kids I grew up with were great kids, over achievers really. Being a rural farming community and a small school our class over achieved academically, professionally, and family. A class of 21 students that can hold our heads high. Very proud of our class. You know we weren’t born of privilege. We were dirt under our nail’s farmers and small-town people. We survived.

First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they carried us. They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can, and did n’t get tested for diabetes. Then after that trauma, our baby cribs were covered with bright colored lead-based paints. We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets, not to mention, the risks we took hitchhiking. As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags. Riding in the back of a pick up on a warm day was always a special treat. We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle. We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually died from this. We ate cupcakes, white bread and real butter and drank soda pop with sugar in it, but we weren’t overweight because WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING! We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on. No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K.

We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem. We did not have PlayStation, Nintendo’s, X-boxes, no video games at all, no 99 channels on cable, no video tape movies, no surround sound, no cell phones, no personal computers, no Internet or Internet chat rooms……….WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them!

We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents. We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever. We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays, made up games with sticks and tennis balls and although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes. We rode bikes or walked to a friend’s house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just walked in and talked to them!

Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn’t had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!! The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law! This generation has produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever!

The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas. We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL! You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the lawyers and the government regulated our lives for our own good. And while you are at it, forward it to your kids so they will know how brave their parents were. Kind of makes you want to run through the house with scissors, doesn’t it?!

For you locals, Cedar Rapidan’s, you can relate to this. We have had the opportunity to frequent the PCI complex. My current wife has a slipped disk that is pinching a nerve. This has been an ongoing problem for quite some time. She is a trooper and put off seeking treatment until she really could not stand the pain any longer. We went to PCI 10 weeks ago. Had x-rays. The doctor thought he saw the problem so scheduled an MRI for a better look. Forty dollars co-pay thanks a lot. A week later we do the MRI. Another $40. Co-pay and another appointment to go over the results. Two weeks later the appointment to review the MRI happens – all of five minutes. Referred to a spinal surgeon. Another $40. co-pay. Six weeks to see the spinal surgeon. His options were surgery or epidural cortisone shot. Another $40. co-pay and referred to another specialist. A week later in for a consultation and another $40. Mind you over this 10-week period, my current wife is in increasing agony and can hardly function.

Now back in the day, namely the 60’s, you would go in to your doctor, get tests and a diagnosis, and come back a few days later for treatment. None of this $40 drip, drip and prolonged delays in treatment. That treatment didn’t guarantee a cure or anything near a cure, but it was a treatment with no waiting. Ah, those were the days. Oh, that reminds me that my dentist, Doc Mulmin(sp) didn’t believe in using Novocain for simple things like fillings. Now I had bad teeth. I had at least 3 cavities every time I went in. You remember those old drills that rotated really slow. They jarred your head. They felt like a jack hammer you see tearing up concrete on the street. Good ole’ Doc managed to hit a nerve every time. Oh, ouch, ouch, and big ouch. That is the reason my toenails are curled over themselves.

Why am I So Tired?
I am Tired, Yes, I’m tired. For a couple years I’ve been blaming it on iron- poor blood, lack of vitamins, dieting and a dozen other maladies that make you wonder if life is really worth living. But now I found out, it isn’t that. I’m tired because I’m overworked.
The population of this country is 237 million. 104 million are retired. That leaves 133 million to do the work. There are 85 million in school, which leave 48 million to do the work. Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal government. This leaves 19 million to do the work. Four million are in the Armed Forces, which leaves 15 million to do the work. Take from the total the 14,800,000 people who work for State and City Government and that leaves 200,000 to do the work. There are 188,000 in hospitals, so that leaves 12,000 to do the work. Now, there are 11,998 people in prisons. That leaves just two people to do the work – You and me.

Bummer and you’re sitting there reading this. No wonder I’m tired.

MURPHY’S (no, not my Murphy) OTHER 15 LAWS

1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
2. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
3. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
4. A day without sunshine is like, well, night.
5. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
6. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don’t.
7. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.
8. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there’s a 90% probability you’ll get it wrong.
9. It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end-to-end, someone from California would be stupid enough to try to pass them.
10. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.
11. The things that come to those who wait, may be the things left by those who got there first.
12. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.
13. Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries.
14. God gave you toes as a device for finding furniture in the dark.
15. When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of twelve people, who weren’t smart enough to get out of jury duty.
Old age ain’t for wimps…but it beats dying young.

Two medical students were walking along the street when they saw an old man walking with his legs spread apart. He was stiff-legged and walking slowly. One student said to his friend: “I’m sure that poor old man has Peltry Syndrome. Those people walk just like that.”

The other student says: “No, I don’t think so. The old man surely has Zovitzki Syndrome. He walks slowly, and his legs are apart, just as we learned in class.” Since they couldn’t agree they decided to ask the old man. They approached him and one of the students said to him, “We’re medical students and couldn’t help but notice the way you walk, but we couldn’t agree on the syndrome you might have. Could you tell us what it is?”
The old man said, “I’ll tell you, but first you tell me what you two fine medical students think.” The first student said, “I think it’s Peltry Syndrome.” The old man said, “You thought – but you are wrong.” The other student said, “I think you have Zovitzki Syndrome.” The old man said, “You thought- but you are wrong.” So, they asked him, “Well, old timer, what do you have?” The old man said, “I thought it was a fart – but I was wrong, too!”

…….. Well my friends, there you have it as told by yours truly to you all. It wasn’t great, but it was interesting at least. Thanks for allowing me into your day, if only for a brief time. It is always an honor. If I can make at least one-person smile, laugh till they leak, or maybe spit out a drink, my day was not wasted. Until we meet again – “TA!”

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