Tillie & Chester #422 10/9/2018

Come, come, come, come, come into my heart tell me, darlin’ we will never part. I need you darlin’ so come go with me – – “Come Go With Me” – 1956 – The Del-Vikings

11849265 – i love 60’s

Welcome to Drivel Over Coffee. The Drivel rambles through this thing called life, stopping here and there for reflection, an enlightenment, some storytelling, and a touch of humor perhaps. Oh yes, an occasional rant. All the while my brain reverberates with the best music in the world – The ‘60’s and early 70’s. Yep – Lost in The Sixties. Remember, the brave kids who made this land free for you.

Finally, we can all relax now that our Supreme Court is fully staffed. Good Grief, Mary Ann, I thought the Presbyterians were slow in hiring their ministers, but the Senate is by far worse. Rather hypocritical having the political polarized opposites fighting over this poor guy. The Senators seemingly were not worried about him in the slightest. The lefties would have been just as happy to see him in the pile of defeated candidates and political has beens as anything. Meant nothing to them. Now you see them on the talk shows after the vote most of the vitriol has left their bodies for now. Like it was never there. They are over the nasty stuff sort of, maybe catching their collective breathes.

I have learned a few things having watched what seemed liked a zillion hours of talk shows regarding the Supreme Court appointment process. I learned from Oscar Am ringer, “Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from the other.” Pretty true I would say. One guy up for re-election pulled this out of his Adlai Stevenson joke book, “I offered my opponents a deal: if they stop telling lies about me, I will stop telling the truth about them.” A Texan reportedly is quoted as saying ‘A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country.”

The Greeks were all over the politics and way ahead of the times with quotes like “We hang petty thieves and appoint the bigger thieves to public office.” by Aesop and “Those who are too smart to engage in politics are punished by being governed by those who are dumber.” from Plato. I have therefore concluded that politics is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians. Finally, what happens if a politician drowns in a river? That is pollution. What happens if all of them drown? That is a solution!

Tillie & Chester
Tillie and Chester knew each other from childhood but were in their seventies when they got married. They had to wait for Tillie’s mother to pass away first, because she didn’t approve of Chester. Back in those days there was no hanky panky before marriage, so Chester and Tillie were both still virgins. Needless to say, Chester was pretty excited on their wedding night, having waited so patiently all these years. However, Tillie was very apprehensive as she had developed a heart condition and would have to tell Chester that they could not do it. Chester is now sitting on the bed wanting Tillie to hurry up. He detects a little reluctance on her part. Thinking that she is just shy, he sends her off to the bathroom to get undressed.

When she reappears in her satin nightie, he gets her to sit next to him on the bed. Not knowing how to get things started, he pulls the first strap on her nightie. She blushes just as red as her satin nightie. She is really concerned about telling Chester about her heart condition.

In the meantime, Chester is looking at the first breast he has seen. It is hanging there down to her belly button; gravity having taken its course over some sixty years. He notices her anxiety but figures she is going to have to be helped a little more. Now he pulls the second strap and sees the second breast unroll downward before him. Poor Tillie is now beside herself. She is going to have to tell Chester about her heart. With a quivering voice and mustering up all her courage, she says, Chester, I have acute angina.” Chester says, “I hope so, ‘cuz you’ve sure got ugly ta-tas!” Postscript: Chester has new hearing aids. Chester and Tillie seem to be happily relieved finally. For Chester, angina has a much more accurate definition in his mind.

Incomplete Instructions
I have been having trouble sitting for quite some time. What with my current wife’s sciatica problems, I figured I had better see the Doc and find out what was going on. So, I went to see him. “Doctor, I can’t find a comfortable position to sit.” The doctor examined me and said, “I’m not surprised that you’re having trouble sitting; you have a good case of hemorrhoids.” OMG, never had hemorrhoids before in my life. He then gave me a supply of suppositories, and told me, “Go home now, and use one of these each morning and one at night until they’re gone. Then come back and we’ll see how you are. Those were all the instructions he gave me, so I took them the best as I could. “I went home, and in a couple of weeks I returned, still complaining of hemorrhoids. “Well, ” said the doctor, “Did you use all of the suppositories?” “Yes, I did,” I said. “I took one every morning and every night as you instructed, even though they were pretty hard to swallow.” “For all the good they did me, I might just as well have shoved them up my behind!”

…….. Well my friends, there you have it as told by yours truly to you all. It wasn’t great, but it was interesting at least. Thanks for allowing me into your day, if only for a brief time. It is always an honor. If I can make at least one-person smile, laugh till they leak, or maybe spit out a drink, my day was not wasted. Until we meet again – “TA!”

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